Tuesday, June 9, 2020

A Pregnant Time

A Pregnant Time, Kathy Rees Johnson, opaque watercolor and collage on paper. 

It has been more than 31 years since I've been pregnant, but I recognize the time we are in right now, and it is a pregnant time.

It started to feel this way early in our quarantine living.  Unless we were called upon as essential workers, we abruptly withdrew from the world to our homes. Early in my first pregnancy, things were a bit tenuous and I had to quit my normal running around (literally) and keep relatively calm and still for a while. Fortunately, I had final exam studying to keep me sedately occupied. A similar demand was issued from COVID-19. Cancellations appeared left and right, and our time of confinement began.

Pregnancy is a time of going inside oneself. The body undergoes changes which are obvious to detect by the impregnated person and those receive a lot of attention, but not more attention than the not so obvious changes around the new being growing within. I feel the same way now. I've had to adjust to obvious changes such as wearing a mask during the limited times I head out to the grocery store or making sure that I keep six feet between myself and anyone not in my tiny sphere. At the same time, there is a whole lot of worrying and wondering what this new life is going to be post-COVID.

There are plenty of books about 'what to expect when you are expecting', but most parents know that the only reliable expectation is that there is going to be CHANGE. I am certain that is true of our COVID pregnancy as well. Already in our delicate condition we are worrying and wondering about how the economy is going to work so that a person does not have to become destitute after missing a single paycheck or how to educate young people when it is not possible to be physically close. COVID has exposed weaknesses. We can also see how 'clean living' is clearing the air and water. Is it possible to continue our relatively clean living?

It is impossible not to try to imagine what life will be like postpartum. What we envision is usually a variation on what we have lived before. We learn about the limits of our imagination when the child arrives and insists on being their own person! The same will be true for our post-COVID world. This has been convincingly brought to us by the death of George Floyd. My idea of a wonderful world was shamefully small, not taking into consideration the systemic miscarriage of justice in our country.

During the pregnancy, the body prepares to support and nourish the life about to be launched. I can see this happening, particularly in the work of young people, leading the way in pointing out our degenerative systems. They are heading into a world brought low with a pandemic and a crashing economy. From what I see, young people are seizing this opportunity to creatively rebuild the world in a more just way.

So, I say thank God for new life and new generations who can further our understanding of what is good. I feel it happening. It won't be easy and there will be serious labor involved. But, CHANGE is coming.

Notes on the art used in the collage:
Georgia O'Keefe, Jack-in-thePulpit No. 3, 1930; and Red Flower, 1919
O'Keefe's imagery is notably fecund. Apparently, she had wanted a child, but Whatshisname resisted, though he had a child with Whatshername.

Vincent van Gogh, Orchard in Blossom, 1889.
Though van Gogh was not appreciated in his lifetime, his work is food for our souls now.